Powerpoint Poet Gifts

Executive MFA

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"You're going to hate yourself."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

"Do me next."

Edgar Allen Poe

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

"Now I really hate poetry."

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Why we need poetry. . .

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

When the world is Mud-luscious - e.e. cummings

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

John Bunyan

"Who wants to hear a funny story about the third quarter?"

'So do you want me to minute that George is dying of boredom and Nigel will rip my head off if I don't stop boring him with my blather?'

Blue Stockings - Female poet who has not sold any of her books

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"Mum! - T.S. Eliot - 'Humankind cannot bear much reality'."

"Oh, this old thing?"

Letters escape from a caged book.

Cafe Momus from La Boheme

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"Quoth the raven, 'Nevermore.'"