Power Conversationalist Pillows

"I couldn't help noticing we both seem about to grab the same little company."

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

"Do you mind if I bounce something off you?"

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.

"Is this as good a bad time as any other bad time you've experienced?"

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"I devote most of my time to defending the bastions of culture."

"Frankly, I just want to talk about how great I am non-stop and uninterrupted for 50 minutes every week on a long term basis."

"I don't mind emotional trauma if I can turn it into a really funny anecdote."

'It wasn't so much a hostile takeover as it was a best 2 out of 3 pillow fight.'

Mobile Phones, "Now we are together we will proceed to the business of the day."

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

A lesson in wit

'Your smile came in a distant third.'

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1, 273, 426 steps."

Person talks on phone as other blogs.

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

'I've found taking a sip of another table's wine is an effective conversation starter.'

'He hacked it off because the women in his weekly painting group never stopped gassing!'

'Dang it! The gals out here leave little to a feller's imagination.'

"My main worry is my anxiety."

'But enough about me...Let's talk about you!'

'The secret is to invite good talkers and good listeners and a good laugh track.'

"Bob's into politics. Date Night is more like Debate Night."

'Back in 1956 you were the youngest Briton to cover the Hungarian uprising. You are presently writing your memoirs in Sardinia. First question: how do you feel about the sorry state the London Underground is in?'

'No idea. He's been there for as long as I can remember.'

Why don't we invite Hypothesis? It's always a good idea to have an educated guest… Party List. Mesomides. Loxias. Anaximenes. Thales.