Potion Making T-Shirts

"Ulrich, that's bad science and you know it!"

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

'The Food and Drug Administration is really cracking down. Now we have to list all the ingredients in our potions.'

'It needs venom.'

"Are your hands clean?"

"And now from downtown!"

"It's the hair of Debbie Wasserman Schultz that gives it the special sulfuric aroma."

Will I ever remember to read the recipe before I throw out the package?

The slow cooker changed everything

"Eye of newt, not eye of tiger."

Witch in drugstore: They're endangered now, so I need a newt substitute.'

'...To be fair, the chemistry teacher didn't ask your Son to drink his practical exam.'

"... No, I don't want you to add, eye of newt and blood of bat... This is our porridge!"

"Of course it tastes funny. How many times do I have to tell you, when it comes to toad's bladder, NEVER use domestic!"

Toadstools

'One eye of newt or two?'

'Needs salt!'

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"I said slime."

Newt sale

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

'Take two eyes of newt, and call me in the morning.'

"Yeah, the Jekyll and Hyde thing is weird, but if I play it right, I get fed twice."

Witch's Brew.

"Did you remove the bay leaf?"

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

'No worries Grizella, let me call my 'eye of newt' guy...'

'What? You used a Welshman? The recipe specifically calls for a scot!'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

'Needs more kale.'

"I trust him - he has a science background."

'Quickly boy, tell me which test tube you drank from?!'