Potato Chip Connoisseur Gifts

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

Homo Zapiens

Unconditional Loveseat

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

Stupid Microwave

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

"When Ed suggested 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more, I suggested a vasectomy."

Couch Potatoes

"I've decided to uninstall your personality and upload mine."

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

"In da house"

'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'

'Whatever, crosswords are stupid.'

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

Working from Home.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"

Let's have the cod. It'll be extinct soon.

I knew from the starch we were a perfect mash.

'What he lacks in intelligence he makes up for in stupidity.'

"Sometimes I wonder if it was worth all the trouble you went through to get yourself cloned."

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

'Peel, Spot! Peel!'