Posthumous Publication Fans Gifts

"Oh, we do this for every posthumous release."

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

'He was a great writer'

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"You've got to be kidding me." Hoover Dam

'Being a brilliant,inspiring teacher is NOT adequate, Hackwell....'

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

They were long past their canine pasts, but the rare stamp brought out the beast in them.

'What do you mean, I'm not your type?'

"We'll have to retract that article. On of our co-authors is the night watchman."

'You know, it's kind of nice turning off the sound, turning on closed caption, and listening to piano music.'

'Golfers rowing a viking longboat.'

Revenge Of The Tipped Cows

Dame Edna Sitwell

I just discovered how to make bronze! Ah, thinking outside the rocks!

Last Chance for Saturated Fats Next 200 Mi.

"I was able to get you a 2-book deal."

'We'd better patent this, so the homo sapiens can't steal it from us, like they did with the fire.'

"Just think of it, Charles – yesterday I was a caterpillar, and tomorrow I'll be dead."

Trying to rectify the Leaning Tower of Pisa

"NOW you call on the Vastu consultant?"

"They're only dummy home security signs, but I've sharped the edges so they'll cut you like a razor."

God changes calendar page to a new geologic time period.

I've traveled back through time to warn: The aliens are here. Open Mike Night Presents Future Guy. They hitched rides in on Halley's Comet every time it's near. Living nanites masquerading as technology … depending on the gullibility of you and me. 200,000 years of riding horses and buggies ... and suddenly we're 3-D printing tools and cars and trees? They're everywhere, just biding time to finish their big plan. They're in your phones, your watch, your cars, and they are nearly done. The brain

"Hush, little baby, don't say a word. Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird. And if that mockingbird won't sing, Papa's gonna flip out and make everyone around him anxious and miserable."

"It's the first tell-all book by a former Administration insider written entirely in iambic pentameter."

To Do List: Invent Smaller Post-It Notes.

"When I was your age I had to go out and mark my territory to send a message."

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice and the Black Kitten.

"Why is it always me? What's wrong with Edward or Siegfried or Elizabeth or Margaret? But no! It's always 'Katie bar the door!'"

Snowmen during the Stone Age...

'I know I'm not that affectionate, son. It's just not easy for me to give you hugs.'

'Kevin!' 'Eric! Long time no see!'

Retrospect Road

Snowflake