Posh Dining Fan T-Shirts

'A cheeky red?'

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"What did Jesus order?"

Prosecco Peacock

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

'I really don't know why we bother coming here - the food's always crap.'

Some days, we all just feel like a little take-out lo mein.

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign

"How about a little more coffee?"

"I could have sworn I had three sausages!"

'I don't have the heart. You tell him the barbeque season is over.'

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

Nouveau wine

'I love what you've not done with the place.'

'At these prices can't you afford a kitchen?' Burner at the table

"Wine makes him sleepy."

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

"I'd skip dessert. You'll be quicker on your feet."

"Does it come with magnets?"

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

"Pecan pie with rum-raisin ice cream is the best revenge."

'May I recommend the red wine?'