Portrait Connoisseur T-Shirts

Pierre Bonnard.

Cariactures

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Saint George and the Drag Queen

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

"You're my Mona Lisa."

Framed Lady

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

Cocktail glasses swimming in the sea.

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

"Hamlet. By William Shakespeare." Painting.

Diego Velasquez

Marriage a la Mode - Death of the Earl.

"Stop complaining and smile! It's a job, isn't it? NO wonder they call you Mona!"

Truman Capote

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

'How can they call it modern art when it's 100 year's old?'

He's the first Master Sculptor since the Renaissance also trained as a Mohel.

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

"See that? He's the kind of peasant I detest."

Natürlich verstehst du es nicht. Er ist ein Künstler für Künstler.

'I'm very proud of my El Gecko.'

El Greco

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

Charlotte Rampling

Petrarch

Pyramids exploding.

"It's a forgery―and a recent one, too."

The Red Carpet

The Algonquin Round Table

Elizabeth II

After three days the curator decided it was probably upside down.

"Look, you asked me what my favorite book was and it just happens to be A Farewell to Arms."

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'