Portfolio Building Pillows

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

The day the stock market went UP.

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

Build Your Own Portfolio

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Will work for ETFs

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

'Based on your travels, what would you say is the greatest potential downside, if any, to investing in the Upper Amazon?'

'The Truth-in-advertising people want us to call ourselves the 'Sluggish Fund Group'.'

Fiscal Compass for the Global Investor.

Pillaging, formerly Acquisitions Department

'Time to buy.'

Hedge Fund: Our 'Swaps' which mimic stocks, were voted #1 derivative of the year!

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

wealth investment

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

Symbols of Wall St: bull, bear, Humpty Dumpty.

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides simulated hand holding when the market is down.'

Long and Short term investments.

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

'Wake up! You should be worrying about our investments!'

"Make it Dow 30,000, and I'll sell you my soul."

The Invisible Hand of the Market