Portable Tech Fan Gifts

"Yes your smart fridge is impressive, but I'll stick to my phone."

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Time Machine Collision

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

'This reminds me...what generation iPhone are you?'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"Hello? JS electrical? It's about this flat screen television I purchased from you."

Tarzan mobile phone

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

"It appears you have a virus."

'Yes, a winky face is correcy...But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices know as 'complete sentences.''

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

Fireplace Projector.

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

'All I'm saying is that if we don't want to be invaded, we'd be better off with weapons of mass destruction.'

"How am I going to put in a new tape?"

'Very impressive resume... new printer?'

"How do I turn Alexa off?"

'No, officer, I wasn't driving erratically while talking on the cell phone. I was text messaging.'

"Err... Excuse me Sir, you've forgotten the user manual for your super mini mobile."

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

Lincoln's Gettysburg URL Address

Vents, real and digital.

Push Notifications

'Maybe we should get into high-tech.'

3...2...1...I'm Recording

Remote Toaster

'I can hear it ringing, so my new super mini-maxi phone must be here somewhere...'

"Why did the chicken cross the road? It was wearing a Fitbit?"

'And then, after soccer practice, we stopped at crazy Al's Big Screen TV Store!'

'And this wearable smartwatch sends a text to my wearable smartglasses to let me know when I'm not wearing any pants.'

Selfie Extension Stik

Something keeps shorting out my bug zapper. Maybe it's lightning bugs!