Porcelain Perfectionist T-Shirts

'Porcelain! I must have porcelain!'

"You may be more familiar with her maiden name, Kelly, Grace Kelly."

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

The wonderful world of cheese.

You're the puff in my pastry!

Picking pastries.

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Needs salt!'

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

Baking

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

"Excuse me, but could you ask the chef to make this a little more photogenic?"

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

'Quick, press control Z!'

Cookery Lesson.

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

'In an inexplicable attack of nerves, Elliot becomes the first person ever to screw up John Cage's 4'33'.

Sleeping on the Job

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

Come dine with me!

American Pastry

I Bake. Deal with it.

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

'..and one for the pot.'

"Don't you just love it when they lick the plates?"

"We got a report that you're rolling in dough."

"And that's when I realized that I much preferred making frothy desserts."

"Quit moving"

Artisanal Pottery

"For tonight's performance I have stripped everything, as far as possible, down to the "urtext" edition."

'How's the ringtone coming along, Ludwig?'

The battle of the pianos.

Here's one I made earlier.