Pooch Pamperer Gifts

"Bring us a bottle of your best toilet water."

Best in Heat.

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

"See, Barbara? I told you to walk faster or I wouldn't get the spot I wanted."

A woman holds a sling which has her dog in it.

'Don't you think you're spoiling that dog,Dorothy?'

'You think more of that 'bloomin' dog than you do of me!'

The Poodle and The Twooudle.

'For them it's an air freshener. For me... it's the olfactory equivalent of white noise.'

'Old Fred spoils that pooch of his!'

'I know you have been very good. But all that entitles you to is a 'walk'.'

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

Shampoo for Normal Fur, For Dry Fur, and for Fur Beyond Description.

"I always add a few breath mints to his food."

Bitchbark Canoe

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

'That was fun!'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

'And the cat is due back in 2 weeks.'

Meanwhile in Hollywood

Dogs shaving

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

"I'd go with you, but I'm a non-sporting breed."

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

Dog Dressed to Eat