Political Irony Observer Gifts

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'

"Barry stop!. . . I'm you! I'm Barry from 2008. I'm using a time machine to stop you from making an awful mistake!"

AI Summit

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

'I wouldn't worry about going before your time. You're too old to die young.'

Kangaroo with a smoking baby.

'He was a shooting star, passing through the firmament. Lighting up our dull lives with his all too brief presence.' 'I think we're at the wrong funeral.'

'Sigh - Yes, I will probably be dying alone.'

"Don't touch that Jake! It's bad for you!"

The Best System in the World

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

"You've done some outstanding work in Public Relations, Benderman. Unfortunately, you work in Accounting.!

'The exercise hasn't been a total failure. My personal trainer lost 10 pounds.'

'Man, you are the first parole office to truly understand me.'

"It's time we have a little chat."

Church Parking

'Look at the bum on that Wayne, is she that girl that worked at the Burger Shack?'

'I don't know why other people pray in school, but I pray in school because I'm not supposed to.'

"And then one day, I had this revelation: Why not go public with my non-profit business and start making some big bucks?"

"With all due respect, I prefer the term 'con artisan'."

'I have this nagging fear that everyone is out to make me paranoid!'

End of the Pier Show

"You may quote me on this - Freedom of Speech is this country's most valuable asset, which is why we must use it sparingly."

'If they didn't want us around, how come they keep putting food out for us?"

'He's petitioning the Government to ban petitions.'

"I've watched these workout videos for hours. They haven't helped."

Marriage a la Mode - Toilette scene.

First Church of Fiscal Morality: The Meek Shall Inherit The National Debt!

"We look very peaceful."

"Happy Birthday! Is this a bad time?"

'Would it be possible to fire last year's 40,000 employees a second time?'

'It's true I'm homeless...that's why I want the loan.'