Political Humor Fans Gifts

"Well, I can't remember what we've agreed on. But at least we've sorted out our expenses!"

Safe space - Do not enter

"Could you elaborate on you Career Objectives section where you have 'Death to America the Great Satan'?"

'It's only money!'...'Better yet, it's only taxpayer money!'

'Tim, the idea we would bug reporter's phones and listen to their private calls is preposterous. Incidentally, how was your wife's bunion surgery? And are Timmy Jr's grades improving.'

'Don't you just love having tax-exempt status?!'

"It's too late to give a tax cut to the rich, Sire -- They're all poor now."

Conservative party calling Dignitas about election.

"Can you keep those intelligence briefings down to 140 characters or less?"

'Let's tread on him.'

'We thought we'd put in the detail later.'

COUNCIL OF ECONOMIC ADVISORS: 'They say I should conquer Switzerland.'

"Make up your mind - we close in an hour!"

'Mother says the Border Patrol was VERY rude!'

'It looks like a Homeland Security sting operation.'

"This is not for covid,Mr. Putin, this is for rabies!"

"Remind me again, did the President say that or was it the Kardashians?"

"Surely all our troops don't feel that way!"

Armed Teacher

"When the government said we might need to stockpile before Brexit I don't think that's what they meant!"

"Trump doesn't pay any taxes. Why should I?"

Boris Exiled to St. Helena

'I'm on a budget TOO, you know!'

'Of course we have a pluralistic society! — there must be millions of people out there!'

'Look, people -- I just work here.'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'Amateurs who work cheap degrade the cartooning profession...Illegal aliens are great for our economy because they work cheap....'

'Books: Bill's Memoirs, Hillary's Memoirs.'

'We'll have to expand the dungeon, Sire -- it's full of former Prime Ministers.'

'If you think it's tough being a poor, oppressed peasant, you should try being a king sometime!'

'Gerald and I became pacificists after realizing the Iraq might not have a happy ending.'

'Forget about the Holy Grail for now - I want you to look for weapons of mass destruction.'

'Those Labour education policies...'

'This isn't either for my own good!'

'We gotta find them crazy bastuds that ain't safe with guns, and take 'em out!'