Political Comeback Gifts

'At least you got something out of your political rehabilitation.'

'But O, that I were young again, and Democrat!'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

'No matter how cynical I become, I can't keep up.'

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

Desk sign: 'Brown-nose'.

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

Professor Ernie's history of philosophy. Rene Descartes had a difficult childhood. I think, therefore I am! I know you are, but what am I?!

'I am the winner!'

And so, Rudy unwittingly became an investor in The Infant Restaurant Critic. At first, he was furious having lost his weekly paycheck. But then it dawned on him: He was back in the dot-com game – for the first time in 20 years. He was practically a venture capitalist! I'm a social media investor. It's a multi-platform play with, obviously, huge mobile capability, global reach, soaring audience share. Revenue model? What? Huh? Beat it.

'When I'm old enough to vote, I'm going to select Santa Claus as a write-in candidate.'

"Edgar's very politically engaged ever since he began using his vote as an anger management tool."

How Gary got his groove back.

America's New Dawn

"With the Suzuki method, they start them campaigning as early as three or four."

"My Mr. Right turned out to be Mr. Far Right."

"He's the most powerful man in the senate."

"Okay, we all know how this is done. There are 4 of you and only 3 regional manager openings. Margaret - start the music."

'Ask not what your country can do for you, unless you want to be bitterly disappointed.'

Vote for Ken and his congestion charge.

'An off-white entertainment giant that's been in and out of favour with the public - what better place for Jacko's comeback?'

"Now just hold on...I've pre-recorded some snappy comebacks since I never remember them during these meetings."

"What is your position regarding the issue of emotional commitment in a relationship?"

SUPER SATURDAY!

"I don't hear anything."

"I've got an idea for my comeback."

Polling Booth - Woman with boxing gloves.

"Is there a reason you haven't done any work?"

"He killed in rehab."

Reid stops Priebus with a 'tax evader' to the solar plexus...

Back on the mound after succesful Elton John surgery.

Canine at the Westminster Pit - Lord Palmerston and Lord Derby

"The gods are energizing their base."