Political Candidate Gifts

"And now I'll open up the floor to softballs."

'If, when the time comes, you set up an exploratory committee, and a website brining in millions of dollars, you can grow up to be president.'

'I can get you a good deal on sacrificial lambs...'

Poor chap has just been selected as a Labour candidate for the next election.

"And, if elected, I promise to put more black people in cartoons."

'You're thinking of standing for the local council? But would they stand for you?'

Thanks to my wife for her unstinting Support

'If elected, I promise to keep working on a great bod!'

Running for Congress

Trump visits a therapist in the lead-up to the election.

"He's on a cultural fast-growing crawl."

"Some day I'll be president of the United States."

Waffle: Official Running Shoe of Political Candidates.

"The poor guy believes in the existence of honest and unselfish politicians!"

'Our super PAC will finance candidates who specifically run against super PACs.'

'With the deficit and spending bills constantly threatening to close it...the sign shows the current status of Congress.'

'Look here! Don't tell me I can't imagine to walk in a poor mans' shoes!'

'The election campaign wasn't so bad -- the rough part was swearing to uphold the Constitution.'

Political Noose

"The average citizen doesn't have a clue - or why would we keep getting re-elected?"

"The labor shortage is real. There's a help wanted sign for politicians."

Drinks cabinet meeting

"So this is how politics is made. . . great!"

"I'm giving you moral fiber supplements, senator."

"My outlandish political delusions are WAY more reasonable than yours!"

"I read someone saw an honest politician riding a unicorn in Wisconsin. . ."

"You had better put these on. . . there is an election coming."

"He's a principled politician, an endangered species."

Mother of all candidates

"Let me be clear. . ."

"A politician is worth as much as his word is worth."

"I'm looking for a children's book that gives a simples explanation of the Constitution. It's for Congress."

'What this place needs is a tank!'

"This is not a good place for me to be off leash."

"I'm fond of you, Dave, I really am, but you're just not tough enough on crime."