Policy Pet Owner Gifts

If you ask me, pets shouldn't be allowed in the House of Commons...

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Pick me!"

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Foster failure"

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"It get it – you're hungry."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"And where have you previously moused?"

Dog Nightmares

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Haute Suture