Poetry Purist Gifts

Homerphobia

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

Technology and literature

'What was the first music they ever said 'this isn't even music' about?'

Pub. This is John. He also loves obscure bands until they're popular then hates them. The Druidiots. Luckies. 50 ale.

"It's people like you who are ruining rock and roll for the rest of us."

The Last Non E-Book In The World.

Infection Control Center. Now Hiring. I should have said "I'm not afraid of hard work" rather than "I don't mind getting my hands dirty."

"Respect the park's Natural beauty. No Instagram filters."

Books On Paper

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'

Information might travel at the speed of light, but the news still travels at the speed of sound bites.

"One thing I'll say for us, Meyer--we never stooped to popularizing science."

"So obvious, there all the time"

"He sold out, so he's sold out"

"I lied in my ad. I hate Wallace Stevens."

"He only dances to The Dubliners."

Hecklers On Poetry Night

Non-Digital Content Delivery Devices

"Isn't this outdated because there are script fonts now?"

"The people in my new novel have started rejecting print media. That's a bad omen."

"Far out Nigel, I know you're a purist, but at some point, you'll need to switch to e-books like the rest of us..."

"No pre-recorded music in this church. It's all 100% organic!"

Man Covers Up Television in Favour of Books.

"Your online comment meets the offence of serious insult. The 13 spelling mistakes in the 17 words of your comment constitutes a crime against the English language!"

Academicians discussing the admitance of Pre-Raphaelites

Hoping to encourage readers to buy the hard copy of the paper, the Journal Times Herald, only printed every other word in its online edition.

'I'm looking for something not written by a celebrity.'

'The Garrett Club'

"Yeah, but I detest subtitles."

I've read fifteen books in the last three months, Randy. What? You? Read? Books were invented 5 thousand years ago, little buddy