Pocket Money Philosopher Gifts

Dispute over pocket money

'I get a weekly allowance but I don't have a retirement plan, and that worries me.'

'Every time I get in touch with my inner child, he asks me for money.'

'How much allowance do you get?'

'I can't get by on my allowance. You're forcing me to borrow from China.'

'Remember, my allowance helps redistribute wealth, since all the money in this country is in the hands of grown ups.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

'Money is a bit tight at the moment, so instead of cash we wondered whether you'd settle for 20% more meaningless protestations of how much we value you?'

"I never said they were well-compensated. I just said they were paid handsomely."

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

"The problem with capitalism is the unequal sharing of wealth. The problem with socialism is the equal sharing of wealth..."

"To be honest the culture sucks, but the pay is amazing."

Power/Expenditures

"If that income is personal, why do I have to tell you about it"?

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

Colin didn't really need a pocket-calculator...he already knew how many pockets he had!

Financial Eyesight

Payroll Dept. My economic anxiety has less to do with the weak dollar than the week's dollars! (Published originally on March 14, 2008.)

'My investment club had morphed into a support group.'

"I know we have to cut costs, but is bringing only one of each a good idea?"

'I'm prepared to pay you a living wage. Of course, what kind of a living you get out of it is entirely up to you.'

'The only thing keeping me from being successful is not having a salary.'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"With so many applicants for a few jobs, we can lower the pay and drop the benefits!"

'My competitor down the street sasses his parents.'

'I suppose you've often wondered what you'd do if you had my income.'

"See here how his later work shows focus and sense of direction..."

Pollution and money

"I have my very own ATM password."

"And the Haves, you might say, are divided into the Gives and Give Nots."

'If that's the going salary, then what's the starting salary?'