Plumbing Sage Pillows

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

"See this area right here, honey? This is why we need to find someone who knows what they're doing."

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

"...And this is the part where he veers off course from the YouTube tutorial."

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

' ... and this is the half bath.'

Music producers.

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

"Well, it could be the rising tide of consumer indifference to our company's latest product, or it might be the sink in the men's bathroom acting up again. We're still not sure."

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"

'Frank is into D.I.Y...'Destroy It Yourself'!'

'Ships plumber reporting for duty.'