Plug Perfectionist T-Shirts

'Allow me. After all, I'm planning to be an electrician.'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Perfection

'No it's still not fixed'

'This Power Point slide has a dynamic layout comparing reading scores throughout the district, which you would have seen if I remembered to bring a spare projection bulb.

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"You're welcome."

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Toastquest!

"Larry made that chair from a pile of sticks."

'I like the plot, but are all those nude scenes really necessary?'

Writer's Block Next 10 Miles

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"Now you can send it."

'This course is a great ego builder.'

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"Sir, you may find this book very helpful, too."

'My holiday season: A rich tradition of belated giving and premature babbling.'

"This gentleman would like a refund. He claims the plot broke down halfway through!"

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."

Think Zero Defects

Mount Everest.

"It's no use. We just can't improve on perfection."

'According to today's boxscore, Rockley, you've made a couple of errors and you didn't score any runs.'

'I know it's your best round ever, but did you really have to enlarge the scorecard that much?'

"Our standards are so high we only hire people who do crossword puzzles in ink."