Plough Horsepower Lover T-Shirts

'This 'tractor-thing' he's bought seems to do our work very well indeed: Early retirement for us Bob!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

'Can you take the lid off this jar for me...?'

"Caption contest"

'Any chance of a ploughman's?'

'Every time we clear all the snow another blizzard hits. We're cursed men Frank. Cursed!'

"How are we on bread?"

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

Army Leader: 'We have ways of making you Torque.'

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

"Yes, we do have an incentive scheme - fall below that line and you're sacked."

Brewery Lorry has Saloon Doors.

Undersized Load

"Do you want brownies or cookies or banana bread or apple pie or peanut brittle or chocolate muffins or carrot cake?"

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

"Yeah, I'm working on my own customized car, too."

May or May not be Hazardous Material...

'Removal sounds politically incorrect.'

'I found a whole bunch of worms in the wheel wells!'

Learning.

"Clippety clop, … clippety clop. …. clippety clop. … clippety clop..."

Back in 5 Minutes.

"Why not take her out for a spin? It'll blow your socks off!"

"A wet winter. but we're making the best of it."

UK Economy

He was a pick-up. She was a dump truck. it was bound to be a bumpy road ahead.'

"Oh, we have a special hell for triathletes. It's just like regular life, except you can't talk about your triathlons."

Scary Scarecrow

UFO

"Walter didn't catch any fish today, but I managed to finish two sweaters."

"The hybrid engine says you care. The gross tonnage says get the hell out of my way."