Playing Football Gifts

'Psych!'

'I like these helmets. They make you hard to kiss.'

Connor Wickham

Futsal

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

I like the Jets...I guess

Football Fans

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Fly Football

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Church for sports worshipers.

Kid uses his violin as a golf club.

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Another football scholarship offer?'

Football Chameleon

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

"I AM at my usual position."

Punt Cake

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

If nobody had invented graphics

The trauma of losing.

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

The Brothers Grime

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

An 'out of this-world' soccor player stops the penalty his way!