Playing Card Aficionado Pillows

"My mom was a Holstein-Friesian, and my dad was the King of Diamonds."

'First, you have to admit you have a gambling problem!'

Playing card king in a litter

'How about a game of cards?'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

Philosopher trading cards.

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'I'll raise you, Lazarus...'

Let the Summer Games Begin!

'Why do you always win at cards but not horses? I can't shuffle the horses.'

"You can get good cards but still have terrible luck."

Existential Risk

Man looking at greeting cards labeled "Apologies for not writing sooner" with sub-headings for different lengths of time.

Irritable Vowel Syndrome

"The dollar held its value today against the yen, the euro, the peso, the comic book and the baseball card."

Cards, Missing You, Missing Ewe (a ram looking for a card for his loved one),

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

'I want one that says 'get lost' but includes a pocket compass.'

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

"Who the hell didn't rewind Jumanji 20 years ago?!?"

'It was so bad you couldn't even use it to play solitaire.'

Putting it Mildly...

Greetings!

'You were a boring accountant in ten previous lives.'

'According to his stats, this right-fielder hit .317 and is 50 in stocks, 30 in bonds and 20 in cash.'

The Trump Administration Alternative Reality Game

And with that, the simple malaise that had been bubbling up for months officially became a general malaise.

"Holy smokes, he's undefeatable!"

Valentines for Things

'Is this the Lonely Hearts Club?'

"Cheater!"

'With Myrna and I, it was love at first slight.'

Killing time, and vice versa....

Greeting Cards for the Narcissist.