Playground Philosophers Gifts

'Swing? We'll drop our phones!'

Modern Nursery Rhymes

"You propose to me and now you want me to sign a prenup!?"

Roger Ebert as a kid 'I know God gave me a gift. I just don't know what it is yet.'

"So where do you get all your ideas from?"

"Look, Emily. We have no chemistry. All we have is recess."

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"So, what do you do for play?"

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

"We're playing Redistribution of Wealth."

"I know I should love my neighbor as myself, but he isn't my neighbor!"

Lonely Rich Boy

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"I'm bored."

Dog helps girl jumprope with wagging tail affixed to rope.

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Recess does things to a man."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

Playground Pipe Dreams

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

"He's only energetic on sunny days."

'Ready Mum?'

Philosopher trading cards.