Modern Playtime Philosopher Gifts

'Wait a second. . . how are we supposed to play on this? It's not a video game.'

'Smith, we need more creativity. You have to learn to think outside the box.'

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"I'm bored."

Playdough's The Republic

'There's nothing on.'

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"So, what do you do for play?"

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Recess does things to a man."

"She's a miniature."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

Hamlet

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

"Do you want to talk about it?"

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

Philosopher trading cards.

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

Jimmy had a very active imagination.

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

"I have to get up for mine 3 or 4 times a night!"

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

Kids playing with the cardboard box instead of the expensive toys.

'This is alphabet soup, Mom. I don't use the alphabet in the summer.'