Playful Parenting Gifts

'Could you help me? My parents are lost.'

"But if I close the drawer, won't my breathable underwear suffocate?"

"Alright kids: two more minutes then the nice man needs the machines."

'It's crazy what a peep will eat.'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

'Dad, make a noise like a dinosaur!'

'Don't clean me up too good... no one will recognize me.'

"Having fun there little guy?"

"I have a new program that draws from his energy to power all our computers and phones. We should be good for the next 10 years."

A mum trying to dry an excited child

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

'She's just great with the children.'

Mittens is challenged by the string.

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"Werewolves of London..."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

'The kids were so sweet...'

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

Baby tells other Baby to call.

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

Epic Battles

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."