Playdough Sculptor T-Shirts

'I was six before I realized there were things you could do with Play Dough aside from eating it.'

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Rocking horse

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

The Sculptor

"Providing great customer care is of course important, but shall we start with how you manage forms TG-45S through to NSD-89b."

"How are your latte art classes going?"

Baker

Bookmore Publishing Co. Autobiography Editor - Embellish and De-Embellish.

"Well, I've been struggling to write a book about my struggle to write a book..."

"Garbage in, great books out."

Origami Mail

Pen mightier than sword.

"In all my years of teaching I've never seen pizza dough spun into a triangle!"

"I read your manuscript with interest."

8th Annual Chainsaw Carving Competition

'Show off!'

"He may be a famous artist, but I find his work too chocolate-boxy."

"Very few new ideas come into Arthur's head anymore. He's living on his fat."

'It's questionable whether your book, Life of a Nobody' will make a Nobody a Somebody!'

Cat builds a castle in it's litter tray.

Bryant and May match heads

"It's a bit derivative."

"He was okay with the spell check but he gets mad when it starts to correct the arc of his narrative development!"

'Best Seller'

"Here comes your order of Play-Doh."

Oog is good at sharpening sticks, but he doesn't know when to stop. You can quit now, Oog. You've made your point.

"Now that the kids and grandkids are grown I can get back to more erotic embroidery."

Rebellious Typewriters

'It's my masterpiece!... Made completely of dough - The leaning tower of Pizza!'

"Yes, I did say you needed to back up all your date. But there's an easier way than handwriting thousands of pages."

Building the perfect snow-boyfriend

'It's a cement mixer.'