Plant-powered Foodie Pillows

"If you want extra virgin oil on the salad that's a £5 supplement...."

'I shouldn't be surprised. Any restaurant that serves Tofurkey is bound to recommend MerNo or Chardon-No-Way to drink with it.'

"States of tofu"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Before/After

"Two vegans, please."

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

Recycling bottle bank.

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

"How would you like your soy protein, mixed tocopherols and methylcellulose patty?"

The Authentic Christmas.

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

What's not to like? They're cheap, tasty adn don't destroy the Rain Forest.

"Wine is plant-based food."

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense.'

"... And that's an 18-pound piece of tofu I shot at Whole Foods."

"The food is excellent. Unfortunately, the inaction of politicians forces my husband to civil disobedience."

"We learnt about nutrition at school today Mum: Our diet didn't rate well at all..."

Fruit and Vegetables - protestors signs read 'Stop this brutality' and 'Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants'.

"Gavin is a bit conflicted when it comes to barbecuing."

The vegan hunter

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

World Meat Consumptiom

"And your tofu, would you like food with that?"