Plant Lover Gifts

"Can't we go five minutes without you checking your flower?"

Flower steals water during a drought.

Pollination Process

Annuals - Perennials - Eternals

"Patient shows definite anxiety symptoms..."

'I'm an eccentric. What do you do?'

'Poinsetta! ' 'Poinsettia!' 'Poinsetta! ' 'Poinsettia!'

'Omigod - we forgot to turn off the humidifier!'

Elder Abuse: 'You're a dwarfish shrub and your berries taste horrid.'

Evolved of the Gardener

"You know, lentils have twice as much protein per serving."

'Looks like we're playing 'good crop, bad crop'.'

'It appears to be a side effect of the herbal eye drops you're using.'

'It's incredible what you can grow in a plot of ground that's only one foot square!'

Flower drinking cola.

Venus Fly trap buying hot dog

'Awww, flowers... So, all is forgiven then...'

Charles's Radical Environmentalism Started with Innocent Tree-Hugging, then Quickly Progressed to Lewd Acts with Rhododendrons.

"Here, puss, puss, puss!"

"How's the conveyor belt system going?" "Okay, I tie the stems..." "I slip on the cellophane..." "And I shove in that little bag of crystals!"

Reporters growing on a tree.

'Social Climber' "Please can I join your golf club"

"How can you let them land on you like that and not eat them?"

Secateurs/Non-Secateurs.

Venus fly trap.

Dandelions.

Hedgehog Waters Cacti.

Plant care.

"The flower store was closed. You like rhubarb, right?"

'I'm taking you off the herbal tea.'

'Now say after me RANUNCLACEAE.'

'. . . And for all you vegetarians out there the Venus Flytrap.'

"You haven't been using your bed pan again, have you?"

'Now that's a rare sight for a Thistle!'

'This corner of the garden's a bit of a subtropical micro-climate actually...'