Plank Appreciator Gifts

Tortured Plank

Brickie's Mate

"The keep saying unrestored and what a nice PATINA, Ted. A better-sounding word for old tarnished stuff would be SCRINCH or SKRITCH, don't you think, eh, Ted?"

"I like to stay on top of things."

'What if I promise not to look?'

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

A child with a parasol is blown off the Chain Pier in Brighton

"Your antique gold watch didn't float."

The Stat-ewe of Liberty.

Mt. Tushmore

'Maybe so, but I bet that beer is nature's second most perfect food!'

"I knew you was mad when you tried to sell me to them "American Pickers" fellers."

Beer

"Careful now. It's fragile."

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

Cybervegan Caf

'Wow, I hate to be disturbed when I'm enjoying a good brew, too.'

If students are more than a test score why aren't teachers?

"There's always one kid that spoils the class picture."

"I don't know who on Facebook told you, but I can assure you Stradivarius didn't make accordions!"

"I was just kidding when I said that thing they sit on is a giant chew toy. I hope you can act cute, because you're in big trouble."

You say the plumage has lasted longer than four hours?

"With Mindfulness, one may learn to sit through all distractions."

Child found in the Street is Brought into Shelter at a Ragged School

Plank

I think this is the episode of "Leave It to Beaver" where Wally and Eddie chain Lumpy's car to a tree. Couldn

Barristers playing a joke

"You definately have a musical ear"

Any old Gold - 'There's a man ahead of his time'

'Cloudy beer! Global warming!'

"Please help me get these squirrels out of my pants. This isn't a pickup line. I really need assistance."

Sword swallower's groin extends as if its the sword

A parcel of postmen

"Yes, you will get a company car. It'll have a big, blue flashing light on the roof!"

'I believe this is one of the original sets'