Plain English Advocates Pillows

Campaign for Plain English

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'What does it say, Dad?'

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

Twitter censorship

'Second grade. When did you discover 'LMNOP' wasn't one letter?'

A man looking into a mirror saying "HA!"; his reflection looking back at him from the mirror is saying "!AH".

"Okay, okay. 'Canine.' That's 'K-N-i-N-E.' Oh rats!"

Freedom Book.

Plain English group.

"Spelling and punctuation is not a fad."

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Corporate person hood!

Weapens of Mass Instruction

Spell-Check Bee

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'Vocabulary'?'

Company spokespersons statement being interpreted into plane English by a second spokesman.

"And don't forget 'the right to shoot your damn fool mouth off'."

"Well, yes, I suppose I could explain the test results in 'plain English' — but then you'd know how sick you are."

Phonetic Man

'Oh, no, not another spelling bee!'

'....and in this ward, a school teacher, teaches English - bad car crash - his pupils have already been in to see him.'

"Friends, Romans, countrymen, heterosexuals, homosexuals, bisexuals, transgender. . ."

'Why English teachers were rarely hung in the old west.'

'Literacy is NOT overrated!'

Woe Befall the Linguistic Interloper

'Class, today we'll be studying the difference between past and present tense...'

Freedom of Expression

Car's bumper sticker reads: 'My other car is a bookmobile.'