Pitching Perfectionist T-Shirts

'So much for the question of whether of whether or not a curveball really curves.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

Pitching Tryouts. Never mind the fastball. They grade on a curve here.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'Attaboy, Dewey! Three up and three down!'

Look, Rusty, your fastball's working and your sinker's dropping perfectly. But if you can't stop chasing the ball after you throw it, I'm gonna have to put you down -- In the minors, Rusty. Oh! You should see your face!

'Yes, Haffner appears to be tiring...'

'The pitcher doesn't want you crowding the plate. Got it? Or next time it won't be just a harmless brushback.'

'This pitcher throws screwballs. Better hand me my 'special' bat.'

Pitching guidelines

"I think your problem is with your release point."

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'I feel confident about our presentation. If there is any blowback, don't worry. We're both wearing our flak jackets under our suits.'

'I hope you made the prospect say no three times before you gave up.'

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

"So is that a slice of a hook? I never know which is which."

Is it a book? A film? A TV show? How do you mime a podcast?

Baseball Dreams

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"This says you should expect to spend six months and at least $800 building the perfect lowrider bike."

'I don't want to be a shepherd. I want to be the policeman who interrupts the play to tell all the mummys and daddys who have parked irresponsibly and dangerously outside to move their cars...'

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'Excellent. But try it again and this time start your sway at the beginning of the fourth bar, O.K.?'

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

Santa's Out Tray.

Football Crazy.

"Your body language says you've lost interest."

"Right here is where you lost the narrative flow."