Pitch Perfecto Gifts

Just back from vacation and pretty rusty, Mel's first sales pitch of the day goes wide and beans his #1 customer.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

Elevator Pitch

The Goalkeeper

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

'I feel confident about our presentation. If there is any blowback, don't worry. We're both wearing our flak jackets under our suits.'

'I hope you made the prospect say no three times before you gave up.'

"I know R&D feels that the product warrants at least two 'really'."

Dragon's den desk. 'I'm in' and 'I'm out' tray on desk.

That's not the reaction I was going for. Let me try to put a different spin on it.

"Jessica has an idea about going to the beach that she'd like to pitch you."

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'Apparently, wild hopes and dreams, re-enacted by Barbie and Ken, are no substitute for a solid business plan.'

'Here's where you give me non-comprehending nods of approval.'

'Well, I'm glad to have you with us!'

Football Crazy.

Jurgen Klopp Caricature

"By the way, about your presentation...Management has made a surprise visit."

'It's the next big thing, but I can't fit it through the door.'

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

Personal Cheerleader.

'Any questions?'

'I think the meeting went reasonably well until he threatened to call security.'

'You want to run that by me again?'

He said nothing about being cremated before his remains were scattered on the pitch.

'Yes, Haffner appears to be tiring...'