Pirate-loving Christmas Fans Gifts

Captain Santa Sparrow

Remote control pirate bully

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

Pirate

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Piracy on a boating lake

"Look what I found. Can we keep him?" "Wow! A real pirate!!" "Go ask your mother."

The Dubloon Stops Here

'Are we there yet?'

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"I got a swiss army hook!"

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Treasure Island Book.

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"Shall I let them breathe."

Pirate

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

tRUMp, Pirate President

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'