Piracy Gifts

'So the good news is the operation was a total success. Bad news. . . we were out of hooks.'

Aid relief not getting through to Somalia because of pirate attacks

Wooden ship with large Advertising sails for Seasickness, scurvey, mutiney

"You'd be amazed how quickly a boat like that pays for itself."

'It's a treasure map.'

"I'm guessing his weak points are distance and footwork."

Pirate trying to choose what to wear

A pirate fishes using his hook.

"Your insurance doesn't cover carpentry."

Three pirates at the urinal - one looks down and says 'Ahhr, so you must be Long John Silver?!'

'You can't fire me, I quit!'

Talk like a pirate accountant day.

'Interesting business plan.'

Captain Curling Iron.

Francis Drake

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"

Pirate Treasure

Captain Hook tries the cigarette patch.

Ablast! I've stayed ashore too long and taken root.

"After careful deliberation, I've decided I can no longer represent you as your lawyer in this case."

'Bah, it's a NATIONAL treasure!'

"I like how you succeed, despite your disabilities!"

The good news was that the crew got free dental care.

'Honestly, all I'm looking for is a job with a better health insurance plan.'

Plunder Local.

"According to the map the cryptocurrency treasure must be buried here!"

'Okay, Pete - same time next year?'

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

"Shall I let them breathe."

"I admit I'm surprised, but it does explain why your online dating profile lists 'Royal Navy' as a pet peeve."

'Wow...you must have had a really bad day, eh, mate?'

"Think he'll strike fear into hearts. . . or pity?"

"I don't care if I am getting a bit long in the tooth... I'm not changing my name from, Blackbeard to Greybeard!"

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

Hourlgass Pirate Treasure