Pier Dweller T-Shirts

'His bait got away.'

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

Fishing from the Pier

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

'Arf! Arf!'

"The only problem with living at the top of a mountain is the constant stream of people coming to ask stupid questions."

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"The dangers of texting while walking #17"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"I can’t believe you’re doing this! I have abandonment issues! Abandonment issues!!!"

'. . .actually I'm not a real Guru, I was forced up here originally by the property prices.'

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

"I know. I miss him, too."

'It's the newest thing out. A big screen fish finder.'

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

New York Scatological Society

OM, SWEET OM

"He knows 'sit, stay, paw' and 'upstate.'"

"Could you fellas tell me if there's anyplace around here where I could find a fax machine?"

Natural Phenomena of 15-E

'Not likely - the last time I went in one of those, it sank!'

'Honey, I'm home.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

A bricklayer building a tree

Yeah? Delivery! Come on up!

Articulated taxicab serving two hotels.