Pickup Artistry Satirist Pillows

A man walks a trojan horse in a dog park.

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

Erdogan Replaces Trump on Putin Horse

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

'Secondhand smoke.'

'Well, so much for our legendary ability to eviscerate cattle with surgical precision...'

US aid to Ukraine

'Turn the other cheek, reverend.'

American Bombs

Democratic Party Access For Under $100.

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

Democracy - or die!

Manhattan Woods

The Ultimate Reality TV Show: Apathy Island

"Honestly, guys, my check is in the mail."

Caution: Falling Businessmen - A Sign of the Times

'And here's the crown jewel of the collection. It's an '86, totally organic, and the UK Bag Manufacturers' Association rates it a 99.'

The Jumping Tank

"They should've called me for the sketch instead. She's not even funny. What a complete bomb-ala."

'Wanna help make sure we don't become an endangered species?'

"We might need that ball, boy!"

The harvest

"Does it occur to you that the only thing separating us is a basket of bar snacks? And a flimsy basket at that?"

DHSC considering as-yet unlicensed flu vaccines to boost supply

'Oh no, they're rolling back the frontiers of the state!'

The Conservative Party attempting to save the Church from the Liberals

Covid Podium

'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

"Objection! Tar and feathering the witness."