Physics Humorist Gifts

Lola Knows More Than She Lets On

"Not again!"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Albert Einstein

'Teenagers!'

The Solar System (after deregulation)

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

'Mayday! Mayday! I'm in the drink!'

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

Cell Bar & Grill. Happy Hour All Day. The new owner is an endorphin.

How Glaciations Begin

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

The new Physics

Evolution...the wifi rhino.

Evolving/Devolving

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!