Phone Whisperer Pillows

'A human being answered the phone!'

"Just to let you know I've confiscated your son's mobile."

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

Jack of all trades

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

'You said the computer was coming between us. So I put your name as my password.'

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

'...and that is my philosophy.'

Computer help.

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

"Can you spare a few megabytes of your precious time?"

"Look, the numbers don't lie."

Perhaps we could get the Saatchis to pain a pretty picture.

We don't want statistics that reflect the actual market situation. We want statistics that reflect what was decided in this boardroom!

"I think we could work very well together."

'Interactive TV news.'

Psychiatrist interview an irrational number

I can read this audit, but HOW should I read it...What is my MOTIVATION, how do I bring these figures to life,make them sing!... Colin often wondered whether accountancy had been the right career choice for him

"We ran the numbers on how climate change will affect economic growth, but the numbers got so spooked they just kept running."

"Just got back from the client meeting and great news. . . your work isn't dead. It's beaten senseless and run over by a dump truck...but still very much alive."

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

Where baby grand pianos come from.

Cellular Plan

"He likes to make clients feel important..."

"I keep getting the feeling I’m being watched."

Alternative Accountants

"The government is confident it has its numbers right. . . we're just not sure what order to put them in."

'He's had too much exposure to wi-fi.'

Office full of computers and wires.

"You got my text... but did you get my subtext?"

"The numbers don't lie, but we can fix that."