Phone Queue Warrior Gifts

"Please stay on the line for the next available agent - unless, of course, you are feeling tired, very tired, or maybe hungry. . ."

La Table

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

'I'm sick of answering the phone - half the time, it's about business!'

'You think you have it rough. Try organizing a waiting room.'

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"The doctor says Tia Carmen is resting now...he's encouraging all family visitors to go home. We'll see you back here tomorrow."

The interminable!

'This is taking longer than my stay in hospital!'

"When they said I'll get unlimited calls and texts with my new mobile contract, I didn't realise they would all be from PPI insurance companies....."

The First Commuters

Call Center.

"We already changed our phone service to something or other last week, so we don't need whatever it is you have."

'I'll take #1.'

'While on hold, press #1 for classical music. Press #2 for rock music. Press #3 for country music. Press #4 for...'

Seven males, ranging in age from a baby to an old man, wait in a line monitored by a uniformed guard.

'Tell the doctor I'll be with him in another page and a half.'

"Well, if you want my blood pressure lower don't keep waiting two hours to see you."

"If I ever feel that life's moving too fast, I just stand in the prescriptions queue..."

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

"The doctor would like to know if anyone else out here needs surgery before he puts his stuff away."

"You appear to have caught that bug that's been going around my waiting room."

"When did we switch from magazines to musical instruments?"

Patience Tested While You Wait.

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

Three people waiting in a queue.

You'd think fro the cost of an appointment, the doctor could afford current magazines!

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

"Well, I don't think it is your constitutional right to interrupt my dinner with a sales call."

Top 10 things to worry about in 2020.

"Fill out the form and have a seat in the waaait... waaait... waiting room."