Phone Call Warriors Gifts

It's that danged telemarketer again.

"If you would like a break while on, hold press 1 if you'd like to go and wash your car..."

Soothing music whilst waiting for phone line - for Vivaldi press 1.....

"Well, I don't think it is your constitutional right to interrupt my dinner with a sales call."

"... Or, if you're still listening to all of these automated options and we can't put you off making this call, press 9."

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

'I'm sick of answering the phone - half the time, it's about business!'

Sudok Fu: Sign up for class today!

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"Hi...I was just phoning to see if you got my e-mail?"

"When they said I'll get unlimited calls and texts with my new mobile contract, I didn't realise they would all be from PPI insurance companies....."

Call Center.

"We already changed our phone service to something or other last week, so we don't need whatever it is you have."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"And a 'good morning' to you, too"

"So...As I was saying, nothing will actually change..."

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

Collar I.D.

Henry proudly models his new goggles that prevent him from losing a contact lens.

'And just FYI, I was a caterpillar when you first put me on hold!'

'This is the technical support. To become connected to a service agent, please press the root of 576081, divided by three, times one point seven, mins 429.1.'

"No one whose name is pronounced that way lives here."

"Please stay on the line for the next available agent - unless, of course, you are feeling tired, very tired, or maybe hungry. . ."

"I'm going to put you on hold for a few minutes...to see if you totally lose it."

Hold, Hold, Hold, What you imagine all the phones look like at technical support.

Assertiveness training - man answers phone; 'Can I get back to you? How about when I'm darned good and ready?'

'If you wish to complain please press 2 and then select the Death Metal band that you'd like to listen to while you are on hold.'

“Something’s wrong with my android.”

The search for common ground.

'Just once I'd like to hand up on a wrong number before they hang up on me!

'Stop phoning me at work. I don't care if you have got a technical problem!'

401 Error

'Can't you see we're having a conference call?'