Phone Prisoner Gifts

Mobile Prison

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

"White Collar Prison"

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

'Okay, I'm going to make the phone ring just once, and I want you to refrain from picking up. Bite the towel if you have to.

Modern Narcissism

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'I'm going to have to transfer you to someone I don't like.'

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'

"Can we wrap this up? Our phones need charging."

"You're young enough to play tag, but not old enough to borrow my phone to play phone tag."

'Would you stop with the Twitter alerts already? I'm standing right behind you.'

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

Pizza Delivery Delays

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

"OMG! The PDA was 2 much. I was lol. . . Oh, sorry Daddy, I'm just so use to texting!"

"The doctor said I've got 'texter's slump'."

"The secret of time management? Never take anyone off hold."

"Can I call you back? I'm right in the middle of something."

Evolution

'Sorry, I can't talk now, Mr. Harris, I'm texting right now! I'll take whatever punishment you want to give me.'

The Perils Of Texting While Conducting.

'Your texting addiction sticks out like a sore thumb.'

"...and don't fall for that trunk enlargement scam."

"Beastly sorry about all these interruptions."

'It's for you.'

I told you not to text and spin, Simone.

'If you don't mnage to have enough sunshine you should eat more of oily fish, black caviare, eggs and butter.'

'There is someone on the phone for you.'

Champagne cork stopping sand in hourglass

'I'm sorry but the manager doesn't like me taking calls at work!'

'Are you gonna answer that?'

A frog answers a phone

Throw-Your-Voice Mail.