Phone Conversation Pro Pillows

"You ran a classified ad to sell some of your unwanted items, didn't you?"

'The classic masks of Comedy and Tragedy, or as they're now known, emoticons.'

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"I'm upstairs right now. On weekends and holidays, I go downstairs."

A senior moment.

Time management office worker

'I'm sorry, Mr. President, he can't come to the phone right now...he's doing that crazy hand jive.'

'I'm on my break, Sam... I'll call you back when I start work.'

"I'll have to go now, Penny. My boyfriend keeps wittering on about something or other!"

And the crowd goes wild—except for Mary, because she wasn't paying attention.

"Just sitting here widening. You?"

Telework Pants

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

". . . But, hey, man, I just want to say this in all sincerity, man, that you are the greatest, man, you the el numero uno cat in my book, man you. . ."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"Can you hold a moment? I've asked you before not to donate my organs till after I'm dead."

"Half-dressed Covid pizza special."

'You've been texting during work hours again!. . . Your keypad is still warm!'

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

"Did you give me the finger?"

"I'll have to go, we've been talking for ages"

'Could you read it back to yourself? -- I hate to get into sloppy speech habits.'

'Hi mom! How are you? I'm very well! How is dad? Hi mom...' 'Damned parrots...'

"We will have to go back. The dog wants to go out."

'When a caller asks for me, I'd appreciate it if you'd stop saying 'who'?'

'I've got to go - we're having the zebras for dinner.'

'Hello, is that the government? Yes, I was just wondering... is the lambada still forbidden?'

"We are experiencing high call volume. Please do not hold."

'When I pick my nose, it means I'm going to object.'

"Underpaid, overworked, stressed and exhausted... still enough of my problems, what can I do for you?"

"Mom! You and dad won't believe this, but right now I'm watching two flies making out on top of a can of soda!!" Dan was really lonely.

"Yes, Mother ... I'm still single."

"I'm just the office boy Sir Elton, and have no idea how the leak happened - so there's no point in giving me a rocket, man!"

'No, not abominable. The normal kind.'

'My spring cleaning got spring fever.'