Phone Call Screeners Pillows

If it's for me, I'm not here

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'I could text you...I can fax you...I can email you...I could ring you...Lunch?...I can't make it.'

"I'm just sitting here collecting vast amounts of metadata. And what are you up to?...Oh, I already know."

Cinema. Save me a seat, dear, behind you.

"Look, you guys call here all the time and we keep telling you - we don't tale telemarketing calls! If you call one more time, I..."

'Federal Bureau of Technological Compliance - May I help you?'

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"Well, would you look at that. . . it's been below zero for two weeks back home."

"Where's my smartphone?"

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

I'm away from my desk. Any message you leave won't be of any importance to me.

Listen to a lot of phone pitches while I'm at work?

'Never fails,,, The second we sit down for dinner,'

'I hope you don't want to leave a message - he hates messages.'

No calls, I'm resting on my laurels.

Collar I.D.

"Linda, when answering the phone it's 'Edward Case, Psychiatrist' not Ed Case..."

"Line one is on line two..."

"I only wish this was the final notice."

F. Uh-oh

'This is the voice mailbox of Rip Van Winkle. You have forty seven thousand two hundred and six messages...'

'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'

Computer help lion.

"Another bloody cold caller asking if I want to lead the labour party!"

'Just once I'd like to hand up on a wrong number before they hang up on me!

"How many times do I have to tell, you, don't call me at work!"

"Guess how I got even with the telecommunications industry today."

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."

Right now, he's in his man cave.'

STRIP Hambone: Cleaner answering the phone in office

'I had a great day! I woke up 10 people, interrupted 28 breakfasts, 42 lunches and thoroughly ruined 21 dinners.'

'Who is this? Could you please stop cold calling me?'

'Oh, Hi, Fred!...I was just thinking about you'