Philosopher Of Leisure Gifts

You can have your highway of life. I prefer the parking lot of life.

Evolution of Chair

'I suppose he gets lost in thought because it's such unfamiliar territory.'

It's the dinner I didn't make. It's kind of a Zen Thing

"The long wait for greatness to be thrust upon one."

At the 2021 Religious Games

Winter Weather.

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

"He walked in, said he was a visiting scholar, and made himself at home."

'Something tells me asking him to delay his retirement may be futile.'

"His face may be in the gutter, but his bum's looking up at the stars."

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

'And everybody expects me to be happy, which only makes things worse!'

'Now, as many of you know, I was the Monkey's uncle...'

'I had multiple personalities.'

"But Mom said to ask YOU!"

"But if you teach him to fish, you have fed him for a lifetime."

'I see you've been chasing parked cars again. Wanna talk about it?'

'The shrink said my holiday was hereditary - my family.'

"Since you retired, you've gone to pieces!"

"Oh, I don't mind being called 'Reaper', it's the 'Grim' part that gets me...my name is actually Darryl and I'm a pretty happy guy!"

Academics At the Beach

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe'."

If there are eclipses of the sun and eclipses of the moon, how come there are never any eclipses of the earth? Can we continue this tomorrow? It's getting dark.

'Could you ask me how school was later? Right now I'm off-line.'

Adan and Eve.

If it's broke, don't bother to fix it...

"What's the secret of your longevity, Grampa?" "I guess it's because I was just never that curious about anything."

"The boss is on a working vacation and we're on a nonworking vacation."

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

I think you've eaten enough fireflies, Ed.

I don't let my conscience be my guide, I consider it more of a wingman.

"I used to live each dray to the fullest. Now I'm satisfied with every other Tuesday."