Pharmaceutical Representative Gifts

"...and our new drugs - Palistilap, Orfinifro and Kyriltliryk - are all palindromes."

'...but do not take Clynkovix if you are already taking any other drug with a ridiculous name.'

'There's nothing wrong with me. I just want to ask the doctor if any of these drugs I saw on TV are right for me.'

'This second prescription is to calm you down after you see the cost of the first one.'

"Try this – I just bought a hundred shares."

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

'We have a tournament to see which drug reps get to see the doctors.'

'If laughter is the best medicine, can we bottle it and sell it at stores everywhere?'

"And it's recommended by nine out of ten people we believe to be doctors."

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

'...I used to lobby for the pharmaceutical industry.'

"This new drug has been proving to be very effective for my bottom line."

"If you buy two name brands we throw in a generic for free."

"I have exclusive rights with Pfizer."

Push In And Turn

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"Is the drug that you are prescribing available as a generic, so I can save some money, or at the very least, available from a pharmaceutical company that I own shares in, so that I can make some money?"

Pill for that,

"Just call me...Mr. Saturday Night!"

"Let me through, I'm a pharmaceutical rep."

Pill for that.

"And we'll find out your test results right after a word from our sponsors."

Oh, for Pete's sake take some this medicine. You're useless, but at least it will make your COUGH more productive!

"We at MEGAPHARMA are 100% behind the benefits of 'talking therapies' which is why we've developed MEGAZYMOLIN to enhance the experience..."

"No fair, Shelly, you always get to be the pharmaceutical rep."

"We're in trouble, JB, people are actually starting to read the small print in our TV ads!"

"Gary is from pharmaceuticals."

'Our news documentary, 'More depressing government shenanigans,' is sponsored by prozac.'

'Terrific commercial. I'm sold. You'll start on that medicine immediately.'

'Your prescription is ready. How would you like to finance it?'

"...but do not take Clynkovix if you are already taking any other drug with a ridiculous name."

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Covid Variants