Pharma Enthusiast Gifts

"The sleeping pills take time to work. Don't expect results overnight."

"So I guess this probably counts as an adverse event."

These Sales Reps get more aggressive every year.

"We've managed to cut down the sixteen pills you were taking to just one!"

'It cures it in chickens, it causes it in mice.'

The start of a clinical drug trial. Your honor, we will prove beyond a reasonable doubt this pill is both safe and effective.

"36% of our focus group suffered from the side effects, while 14% enjoyed them."

Pharmacy. Those should make you feel terrific. The white mice are having the time of their lives!

I see we're sharing the credit - you, for coming up with this remarkable broad-spectrum antibiotic, me, for giving it that distinctive cherry-lime flavor.'

'Here are our hot new drugs for fall.'

"We hope to make antibiotics, interferon and diagnostic products, but just to be on the safe side, we're starting out with a line of shampoos."

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

"This is for the pain and these are for the side effects."

'Side effects may include....'

"Our psychopharmacologist is a genius."

"Look on the bright side – the Rogaine worked!"

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

"What I'm prescribing is so cutting edge, even I can't pronounce it."

"I understand they've uncovered some weird new side effects since you were here last."

'...the side effects of this designer drug are more beneficial than it's intended use!'

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

August, 1897 - Arthur Eichengrun invents aspirin.

"We've managed to cut down the 16 pills you're taking to just one!"

'...may the best pharmaceuticals win.'

Meds Toast

Medical Supplies

Maintenance & Repairs. No wonder health care is so expensive, they told me to take to tablets every four hours.

"Doric Ionic Ozempic"

Side Effects

Placebonex: 'Make sure to take it every day, otherwise the effect wears off.'

'These smart pills are overpriced!"

'I have a lot of stock in Zorex Drugs, and I only want medicine that they make.'

'Have you got anything for late onset whimsy?'

"Oh darn, there it is right there: side effects may include squid head."

'Someone's here who'd like you to spend 30 days on an island with 1,000 doctors and some pain pills.'