Pet Therapy Pillows

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

"Cat got your tongue?"

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"A little help, please."

Agility God

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"Good evening, Susan. We've decided it's time you get your own bed."

"Don't even think about it."

"Have you tried biting him?"

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"The patient in 12-C needs comforting."

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Pet Entertainers

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

But it's the other leg that hurts.

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

"That's awesome that you taught him to heel, but I just want him to walk normally."

"First they taught me how to pee on the newspaper. Then they taught me how to fetch it. I reversed the sequence by accident and I've been out here since."