Pet Therapy Enthusiast Pillows

'It's good to talk.'

"I don't know how I'd make it through this without you." "Food."

'Honestly, I never know if I'm coming or going.'

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"Have you tried biting him?"

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

But it's the other leg that hurts.

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

"Rescue someone; rescue yourself"

"It's nice to be wanted."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

"He never sniffs my butt anymore."

So You Finally Caught Your Tail

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

"Have you got one that's a bit more pessimistic?"

'How long have you had this obsessive hatred of cats?'

"Cat got your tongue?"

Pat My Dog $5

"I'm referring you to another therapy dog."

So doctor, what you're saying is that all the time I thought she was a crazy cat lady, it was me who had mental health issues...

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

'I'm sure he thinks he's a parrot!'

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

'See what I mean, Doc?'