Pet Pairings Pillows

'My Master and I are a perfect match: We're both allergic to cats!'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

"It's nice to be wanted."

Cat Gets Hole in One.

'Have you seen little Spotty?'

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.

Rescue dog rejecting potential owners

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

"Unlike the case for dogs, the people that cats own don't grow to look like them. I mean, seriously, what human could look as good as this?"

Be a friend.

'This is it, I've just heard them: They're selling the flat and are buying a house with a garden!'

"Good lord! Four of my dearest Facebook friends died last week!"

"Aw, he's really attached to you."

Dog on Cat.

"Talking's ok but to me walking on your hind legs is simply taking anthropomorphism a bit too far."

"Do they say that pets resemble their owners, or owners resemble pets?"

Not complaining, but when do you think your cats will be done sleeping on the furniture?

Lady sees 'Stop' sign above cat at shelter, thinks, 'Well ... I did ask for a sign.'

"What can I say. . . he likes the hose."

"You mind if we take a little break from playing frisbee?"

Cat Thermostat

'But you're a dog! How can you know how to read?!?'

Collie F, 4 yrs old, well-trained, knows many tricks, wants to meet M, collie, afghan or greyhound. No mutts please.

Pinnochio's Dog.

'We wanna open a budgie account...'

"I know, isn’t it funny how people and their pets start to look alike?"

One man and his dog odour spray.

'You can't see any drug detail men because the waiting room's full?

Dining Out.

'Master is too lazy to walk us, so we walk each other...'